I feel trapped. I feel stuck in some cycle from which I can't escape. I know I lost a bunch of weight a long time ago, but I feel like I don't own that victory anymore. That wasn't me, that was someone else who was able to focus on exercising and eating right.
Being a teacher, I thought I'd be able to dedicate my summer toward losing a bunch of weight. That didn't happen. I'm not any more motivated to exercise, I'm just more caught up on my Netflix watching. I can't even get myself off the couch.
I weigh 292 pounds and can't help but think if I don't get my weight under control, I'm going to die early. I'm going to have an uncomfortable and abbreviated existence. That keeps me up at night.
So what do I do? Every time I try to psych myself up to get on the right track, I fall off. I give up. I don't commit. Something needs to change. I need to fix this.